Regardless of the type of adoption, one of the greater challenges along the road to building a family is the high unpredictability that comes with the territory. It requires, and often tests, one’s faith that it’s the right path or the right time. Sometimes things go as planned or even more smoothly than we had envisioned; but other times we may encounter setbacks – sometimes very heartbreaking setbacks.
When adoption falls through, parents can become overwhelmed by grief and loss. It can be a very isolating feeling, while most people you know simply cannot understand, having never adopted themselves. After months or years of preparation, dreaming and hoping, the news that an adoption has fallen through, for whatever reason, can simply be devastating.
If you or someone you know is going through this, please know that it’s a time of healing. You may not feel like getting right back into the matching process immediately. You might feel conflicted by pressures such as timing versus needing to grieve at whatever pace necessary. It’s important to listen to your heart and allow yourself to work through the loss. The process will look different for everyone. It can be helpful to lean on the support of others. Talking to other foster and adoptive parents or a therapist can help to guide your healing journey. To find a therapist, support group, or to talk with one of our Resource Specialists, please reach out at 414-475-1246 or 1-800-762-8063. We are here to support you.